


When Shit Goes Down

by brotherfuckers



Series: Striderclan [79]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Assault, Bullying, Fluff, Gen, Overprotective, Overprotective Striders, Protectiveness, School Fight, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-27
Updated: 2014-02-27
Packaged: 2018-01-13 21:12:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,699
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1240960
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brotherfuckers/pseuds/brotherfuckers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There is a new kid in class that stirs up some trouble for Dirk as he doesn't pick up on the "fuck off" signals that Dirk gives off which winds up with some shit going down and Dave stepping in for a rescue. Rated Teen.</p>
            </blockquote>





	When Shit Goes Down

**Author's Note:**

> Warnings: Bullying, Assault, Violence, Death threats, Unwanted advances. Nothing too bad (not like Highschool Sucks) but just a heads up. Oh, also terrible Canadian slang.

Dirk looks around the classroom to make sure that he isn’t in Japan and that there isn’t brightly colored protagonist sitting in the back corner staring out the window. But he isn’t in one of his animes, so he returns his attention again to his homeroom teacher presenting a new exchange student.

“Howdy! I’m Jace Skyler. I’m from Nova Scotia, which is in Canada by the way, so forgive the accent.”

Dirk snerks a bit to himself. No way this dude could be worse than Bro, than drunk Bro definitely. Drunk Bro is mostly intelligible where this guy barely had anything. Maybe if they got him to say shit like ‘out’ and ‘about’, but at this rate, he hasn’t even done the classic ‘eh’ at the end of his sentences.

“So give me a couple days to learn my way around the school and then we’ll definitely have some fun, eh?”

Dirk’s jaw drops.

* * *

Dirk thinks the new kid is playing up his accent as soon as he figured out that everyone was talking to him to hear more of it. Dirk honestly couldn’t get away from it fast enough, but to his utmost displeasure, it seemed like Jace had the same schedule as Dirk, so Dirk gets to sit through each and every one of his introduction speeches made at the beginning of every period. By the end of the day he can’t get out of the classroom fast enough, dragging Dave and pulling him along all the way to the car.

* * *

Jace seems to finally notice that Dirk is in all of his classes. Though Dirk is a bit noticeable with the spiky shades and all, it still takes Jace about six weeks to pick up on the trend.

“Eh buddy, you’re in all of my classes but I’ve never caught your name.”

Dirk looks up from his mechanical sketches. A terrible habit he’s picked up in his english classes, annoyed with the slow pacing of the teacher. It was either sketch or fall asleep.

“Really?”

“Yeah, yeah. Don’t be so owly about it. Just wanted to see if we could have a yarn or so.”

“I don’t knit.”

“Oh don’t be so greasy. I meant conversation. I’m Jace.”

“I know.”

“And you are?”

Dirk’s eye twitched, hidden behind his shades, but Dirk guesses that he won’t be able to ditch the joker anytime soon.

“Dirk.”

“There we go, that wasn’t so hard, was it?” Jace doesn’t catch Dirk’s sigh as he goes on to talk about their classes and the assigned homeworks.

* * *

Even though Jace always seems to have a crowd around him, he still seems to have to come bother Dirk. Thankfully it’s not every period but at least once a day, Dirk finds Jace with his ass on a surrounding desk, asking inane questions that range from school to sports to television and movies to the weather. His Canadian colloquialisms grate on his nerves and Dirk finds himself wishing for more of Jake’s, going as far as to text his boyfriend under his desk.

Dirk doesn’t understand why Jace keeps coming back to talk with him as Dirk purposefully fills the conversations with stilted one word answers and blatant mistaking his strange terms for something else. But it is without fail that Jace haunts him daily for the next several weeks.

Dirk contemplates the idea that he is acting like a suitor for 0.24 seconds before dismissing it as preposterous. He’s probably just annoyed with the fact that Dirk isn’t fawning over him like the rest of the puppets that inhabited the school.

Even Dave agrees with Dirk that he just seems off and tries to avoid ever even meeting his acquaintance lest they be recognized as twins and Jace tries to schmooze with him as well.

* * *

It’s last period on Tuesday when Dirk realizes that he hasn’t been visited by the Canadian. He doesn’t look across the room for him as he’s sure he’s heard the obnoxious rounded O’s earlier this morning which means he’s here. Dirk hopes that he’s finally taken heart all of those subtle clues Dirk’s been giving which all add up to the message “Fuck off.”

Dirk’s actually feeling pretty good about it and the new glasses design that he is planning for Hal as the bell rings and everyone gathers up their stuff. He carefully slides his notebook into his backpack, slings it over his shoulders, and then heads out, ending up at the back of the mass of people rushing the door. He’s content to hang back a little as to not get trapped up in the crowd. He’s just about to pass the doorframe when he hears,

“Eh Dirk!”

Dirk rolls his eyes at the near escape but polite society dictates that he respond, even if he was raised by Bro.

“Yeah, Skyler?”

“You know you can call me Jace, right? First name basis. Anyways, I want to chat with you for a moment?”

“Spin some yarn?” Dirk watches the people pass out in the hall, leaving them alone in the room.

“See I knew you’d pick up on my words. But yes exactly. Because I got something geezly important to ask of you.”

Dirk turns back to him. Jace stands just as tall as Dirk’s slouched posture which is a couple inches shorter than his full height. He has short sandy blonde hair that’s cut into a spiky fuzzed flat top. His brown eyes are dark against his pale skin, paler than Dave’s Dirk thinks. He’s wearing an expression of confidence as well as a pair of scruffy jeans and a popular band’s shirt.

“Shoot.”

“Well, I was wondering if you’d like to go out with me for some seltzer after school.”

“Seltzer?”

“Well I guess we could get some dinner too if you ask me nicely.”

“Uh... no...”

“Not to be forward or anything but I am asking you on a date.”

“Yeah, got that... Um...” Dirk suddenly wants to be anywhere but here, polite society be damned to the eighth ring of hell.

“You know being queer is alright, even in this backwards country and even farther backwards state. I’ll protect you if anyone says otherwise.” He puffs up his chest and straightens his shoulders in an awkward display. Dirk might be skinnier than this guy but he’s pure lean muscle where he is sure some of Jace’s bulk isn’t. The idea that Dirk would need protection is both amusing and insulting between the fact that Dirk could kick the ass of anyone not named Strider and the fact that no one has even commented towards his sexuality negatively despite being open with it with Jake for years now.

“I already have a boyfriend.”

“Oh so you do already swing that way. Perfect, even better. We can skip ahead in my plans,” Jace continues apparently undaunted, and even encouraged with the confession.

“Did you not you hear me?”

“My mom gives me a large allowance so I can take you out to nice places.”

An allowance, how quaint, Dirk comments to himself in the back of his head before recalling his most recent bank statement of his robotic funds. “I don’t think my boyfriend Jake would appreciate that. Not even ironically.” Dirk starts inching for the door.

“Where is this Jake? I’ve never seen him around. Is he blowing you off again? I wouldn’t blow you off. I’d be a right gentleman.”

Dirk stops all movement. Only his shade save Jace from the death glare that Dirk is sending him for vaguely insulting Jake. With a perfectly flat tone of voice, camouflaging the rage below, Dirk answers, “He’s in fucking Hawaii, Skyler. Where he lives. And I visit.”

“Oh, then he won’t mind at all if I steal you away.”

Dirk doesn’t even realize he is moving until his fist hits Jace’s gut and he hears the quiet exhale of breath that comes with a good amount of force. How dare he suggest Dirk would cheat on Jake? How dare he continue the conversation along those lines? How dare he!

Jace crumples backwards and accidently plops back into the chair of a desk, holding his stomach where Dirk punched him. Dirk doesn’t regret the spontaneous decision and hopes that Jace gets the message loud and clear, louder and clearer than before hopefully. But he is glad that he went with a gutshot instead of the face because there won’t be a telltale mark and they are incidentally on school property.

Dirk gives him a parting glare, orange eyes flashing from underneath his shades before he turns on his heel and stalks out of the room. He catches Dave in the hall and once again drags him along. Dave tries to ask what’s up but gets stony silence all the way out to the car.

“What the hell, Dirk?” Dave asks again as soon as the door to the jeep is shut.

“I just punched Jace Skyler.”

“Fucking seriously?”

“He asked me out.”

“God, must have been a terrible pick up line.”

“He asked me out after I told him about Jake.”

“Oh.” Dave falls back into his seat. “Oh damn.”

* * *

They tell Bro about the incident as soon as they get home. He understands, of course, the sentiment behind the hit, but wearily rubs his eyes at the thought of the repercussions to having a fight on school property. Dirk quietly takes the smack to the back of the head and the punishment to run to the store for groceries without the car. Bro keeps his phone near, waiting for the school administration or an angry parent to call him.

But there is no such call, even by the time Dirk tiredly comes home, arms sore from lugging the groceries (including a gallon of milk). They all chalk it up to Jace either being too embarrassed to report it or learning his lesson about respecting a no for an answer.

Bro tells Dirk that he’s a dumbass but might be in the free and clear. He just warns to watch his step around the douchebag.

* * *

Dirk hides his nervousness the next day behind his shades. He doesn’t do anything different than any other day, except he feels so hypersensitive to all of the other students in the hallway. He slips into his homeroom seat and chats easily with his neighbors, only stiffening up when Jace walks into the room. He tracks the other without moving his head to keep from giving himself away. But Jace simply greets his flock of fans and talks just as gaily as ever. Dirk listens closely to the announcements over the intercom but relaxes when he isn’t called to the front. Maybe Bro was right and he’s in the free and clear.

* * *

The entire day goes by without confrontation. Without Jace’s usual stopping by either. Dirk just thanks the powers that be and keeps his head down.

At the last bell, Dirk already has his stuff packed up and is out of the door first. He runs into Dave as Dave is exiting his own classroom. A quick exchange of shrugs explains all. Dave finishes with a nod of his head to the car and Dirk agrees. It’s better than pushing their luck.

* * *

The entire rest of the week goes along similarly until Friday. Dirk’s math teacher asks Dirk to stay behind from heading directly to lunch to help her move some textbooks to storage. Dirk works hard to maintain his stoic expression as she directs him all the way to the back corner of the storage room. He fights the erection that tingles at the memory of fucking Dave that one time.

He definitely does not snerk when his teacher comments on the funky smell.

He’s released from help and heads to the cafeteria just around the corner. His steps stutter just a half step when he sees Jace leaning up against the wall.

“Ey Dirk, I’ve been meaning to talk to you.”

DIrk slows down until he is even with Jace, still maintaining a long arm’s distance between them.

“I feel like I need to apologize for that kerfuffle.” Dirk’s brows crease immediately. It’s kinda awkward for Jace to be apologizing when Dirk was the one who punched the other. But Dirk is not apologizing. “I was a right chirp when it comes down to it. I’m really sorry and should have had a bit more respect.” Dirk nods slightly, still wary where this conversation is going. “I’d still be interested in hanging out. For school things if nothing else.”

“I don’t know, Skyler.”

“I promise I can be right civil. We don’t even have to go off campus. But geely, I don’t even know where to start on the latest project in history. Would you mind meeting up with me to get me started? After school? And it hain’t weathering so we could meet up by the benches outside.”

It takes Dirk a moment to translate Jace’s request. Jace takes that moment of silence as agreement.

“Thanks so much, buddy. Really appreciate it.” Jace pushes off the wall and walks off to the lunchroom. Dirk’s shoulders fall in defeat. But as much as he doesn’t want to, Jace sounded pretty over the incident and Dirk didn’t have anything planned after school. What could it hurt?

* * *

The sun felt good across his back as it warmed his dark t-shirt. School’s out but students are still milling about. And Jace hasn’t shown up. Dirk had texted Dave about meeting up for some studying. He didn’t say who he was meeting with, for reasons, but at this rate he’d be texting Dave again to come back for him.

The crowds are starting to thin and Jace still hasn’t shown up. Dirk rolls his eyes and pulls out his phone.

TT: I lied. I’m a terrible liar. You should never believe me. Why would you go on without me? Why did you leave me behind? Are you really that cruel of a brother? Leaving my ass out in the elements. By the time you get back here you are just gonna find my bleached bo

“Heya buddy!” A heavy clap on the back of Dirk’s shoulder makes his finger slip and hit the enter key, sending the unfinished message. Dirk quickly shifts away from the unwanted touch.

“Sup.”

“Sorry I’m late. I had to grab my stuff from the gym lockers,” Jace explains while gesturing to the heavy sports bag over his shoulder.

“Right. So history.” Dirk leans over to grab his notes from his bag. The next thing he knows there is a sharp _CRACK_ and even sharper pain exploding from the back of his head. “AH! What th-” As Dirk spins around there is a blur next to his head and another resounding _CRACK_ this time to the side of his face. A searing line of pain traces across the top of his cheek all the way to the top of his ear. He’s knocked back down with the force of the blow and brings his hand up as he tries to straighten up again. The third swing connects across his forearm and shoulder and he cries out again as a thin line of pain blooms where the edge of the square pole hits.

He catches sight of Jace pulling his arm back again just in time to block his side with his arm as Jace brings down the lacrosse stick a fourth time.

“What the fuck!”

“How does it feel to be blindsided, Dirk?” Sick of Dirk’s blocking, Jace kicks out, knocking Dirk off of the bench. Dirk lands heavily with his arms still guarding his head and torso. He has no time to right himself as the stick comes down on an overhead swing. “Not very good, eh? How does it feel to be a tool, you hoser? Not good at all, I bet.” The stick strikes the ground on the next hit as Dirk manages to roll his torso away enough, but Jace just ends up swinging the stick to the side like a golf club, biting into Dirk’s ribs. Dirk fights the urge to curl up into a fetal position, but just barely. He makes a broad swing of his arm to grab for the stick. Jace just retaliates with a stomp down on his thigh.

“Fuck!” This is dirtier than any fight Dirk’s ever had with any of his brothers. And different too with the full hits of the blunt object over the delicate grace of a sword. Jace alternates between his kicks and his swings, leaving welts all over Dirk’s body. He doesn’t get another head shot in thankfully but Dirk’s cheek throbs painfully still. And the headache isn’t helping Dirk think of a way out of this situation.

“I just wanted to show you a good time. I was a decent gentleman and you fucking coldcocked me, you dart. No better than a teasing puckbunny.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Dirk fights to get the words out through the pain.

“I saw you staring at me. Thought your silly glasses were hiding that.” Jace’s next swing doesn’t actually hit Dirk but smashes against the ground. Dirk glances over trying to figure out the change in behavior when he sees the now fragmented shape of his shades. He’s glad for a moment that it wasn’t Hal’s pair but then he has to go back to focusing on defending himself against more blows raining down on him.

“Wasn’t fucking staring at you. Stop, please stop,” Dirk whimpers, hating himself for how pitiful he sounds, but with all of the stripes of pain across his body he can’t help it.

“What the FUCK do you think you’re doing?!” a voice roars out. Dirk just curls up a little more as Jace looks to the newcomer.

“Who the fuck are you?”

“I’m your worst nightmare.” Dirk thinks he’d laugh at the cheesy line if he wasn’t in so much pain.

“Wh-” Jace doesn’t get the first syllable out before Dave is suddenly in front of him, crossing the fifteen feet between them in a split second, and connecting his fist to Jace’s jaw. A second follow up shot has Jace dropping his makeshift weapon to try to defend himself. But he’s helpless against Dave’s fury. His fists connect to his face and body, wherever he isn’t blocking as Dave drives him back away from Dirk.

He sees nothing but red. Nothing but anger that someone had dared to touch his brother. That someone had made his brother fall down to the ground. And the fact that it was this fucker just made it all that much worse. Dirk had been so worried the night after, even after trying to calm himself with a skype call to Jake, he had still tossed and turned in his sleep with worried mutters all through the night. Dave’s blood feels like it is boiling and he brings all of the force it gives him into each punch, making him hit harder, move faster, and hurt this fucker like he dared hurt Dirk.

“Stop! Stop! You’re fucking crazy!”

“Mercy? You’re begging for mercy?” Dave delivers a gut punch that had Jace curling down over himself, gasping for breath. Dave takes the opportunity to turn back and pick up the fallen lacrosse stick. Jace’s eyes widen when he sees Dave coming back, but he can’t do much else but wheeze in his general direction. “Scared, bitch? Good.”

Dave’s grip shifts into a familiar sword stance before he lays into Jace, landing just a handful of blows across his shoulders and sides. He doesn’t react to any of the screeches of pain Jace makes. He stops only when Jace is falls to the ground, his face grinding into the ground. Dirt mixes with his tears.

“This is what you did. It doesn’t feel good now, does it motherfucker?”

Dave tosses the lacrosse stick to the side. Jace just whimpers louder. Dave schools the grimaced curl of his lips back down to a controlled state. His blood cools from red hot rage to icy hate. He kicks Jace’s shoulder a bit to get him to roll onto his back. Dave’s foot then moves over to hover on his neck. Jace flinches when he feels contact with the bottom of Dave’s shoe against his skin.

“The hyoid is the bone in your neck that is normally broken in strangulation cases and chokings.” Dave’s voice is flat and emotionless. “But the trachea can be crushed in some cases without breaking the hyoid if proper placement and strength are applied.” As if to prove his point, and control, Dave applies just enough pressure to make Jace try to airly beg for him to stop before letting up again. “I could fracture every bone in your body without killing you.”

Dave doesn’t attack the owner of the hand pulling on his shoulder, pulling him away from the sobbing wreck of a boy. Dirk’s steps are uneven as is his breathing. As soon as Dave is far enough away from the source of Dirk’s pain, he turns and helps his brother walk to the car. He wishes he was like Bro and could just scoop Dirk up into his arms, but he is turning out to be built more like D. Instead he just pulls Dirk’s arm across his shoulders and wraps his around Dirk’s waist. He hates the way Dirk hisses at the touches but they are necessary to get him out of there.

The jeep is helpfully sitting at the nearest curb instead of their usual parking lot halfway across the lot. Dave helps Dirk get into the passenger seat before running around to the driver’s. But once he climbs in, he just sits there numbly. Dirk glances over and sees Dave’s hands shaking. He reaches over and grabs one, letting out a soft breath as the seat belt rubs against one of the growing welts. That small sound seems to be the breaking point for Dave as he suddenly starts sobbing.

“Fuck. Fuck, Dirk. What the fuck?”

“I know. I know. I’m okay.”

“God, Dirk. I was so scared. So angry. He was just hitting you and you were on the ground and- and- fuck!” Dave rubs at his face, trying to hide the tears. “God, look at me, I’m a mess and you’re the one who got hurt. Are you hurt bad, Dirk? Do we need to go to the hospital? Did he break anything? Make you bleed? Hit your head?”

“Nothing’s broken. No blood. And my head is harder than diamonds.” Dirk sounds calm especially compared to Dave’s hysteria. “I’m fine, Dave. A bit bruised and sore. But nothing terrible. Nothing a pint of ice cream can’t solve.”

“I was so scared, Dirk. Your eyes... they looked dead. And he was just hitting you and you weren’t blocking and-” Dirk doesn’t care about the pain at all, fuck pain, as he leans over to give Dave a one armed hug. Dave turns into him and clings. “You dumb spiky haired idiots keep going off and getting beat up.” Dave sniffles into Dirk’s shirt. “I’m supposed to be the baby of the group, you dumb butts.”

“We’re dumb butts,” Dirk agrees. Hindsight is always twenty twenty. “You know something else dumb, we totally left my bag back there.”

“Oh shit. Let me go get that. You sit here and- and don’t move!” Dave scrambles out of the jeep and runs back to the scene of the crime. He slows down a little as he sees Jace stumbling to his feet. Jace turns towards the sound and when he sees Dave, he flinches back, obviously thinking Dave’s back to beat him some more. And Dave is tempted. But Dirk is waiting for him and so he just delivers him a death glare over his shades, somewhat ruined by the teary redness. It still makes Jace scurry away like the fucking bitch he is. As soon as he is out of sight, Dave darts forward and grabs Dirk’s gear and then hightails it back to the jeep.

This time when he gets in, he starts the engine and peels quickly out of the parking lot. The trip home is silent as Dirk just focuses on breathing and Dave plans.

When they are five minutes away, Dave pulls out his phone and calls Bro.

“I need you to come down and meet us in the parking lot.”

“Kinda busy.”

“No. I mean it. I need your help.”

“What can’t the wonder twins carry up?”

“Dirk.”

“What about Dirk?”

“I can’t carry Dirk.”

There is silence on the other line for a moment. “I’ll be right down.”

Sure enough, when Dave pulls into their usual parking spot, Bro is standing there waiting. Dave recognizes the worried shifting of his weight even if his casual stance and blank face showed nothing else.

“You didn’t have to make him worried, Dave.”

“I wasn’t carrying your ass up those stairs. And he’d find out one way or another. You’re face is already swollen like a smuppet butt.”

“Oh that’s flattering.”

“What the fuck happened to you?” Bro asks as he opens the door.

“Would you believe me if I said I tripped and fell into a doorknob?”

“I’d find out which particular doorknob did this to you and dismantle it down into its nuts and screws. And maybe crush the nuts for good measure.”

“Full story upstairs, Bro,” Dave interrupts.

“Right.” Bro makes sure Dirk is clear of the seat belt before slipping his arms carefully under him. He grinds his teeth as Dirk makes little pained noises as he settles against Bro’s chest. Dave handles all of the doors between the jeep and the apartment.

When they get upstairs, Bro gently sets Dirk down on the futon before working with Dave to pick up any first aid supplies that might help with Dirk’s bruises and welts. Dirk carefully works his shirt and pants off, grimacing the entire time. His frown gets deeper as he actually recognizes details of a tread print on his thigh.

Bro pauses at the corner of the futon. His eyes rake over Dirk’s body in a way that would have been nice and flattering if it had been in any other situation. Dirk doesn’t flinch away from the hard gaze as Bro steps in to kneel on the floor in front of him.

“Hit me from behind. Didn’t see it at all. Didn’t even know he had a weapon.” Dirk gingerly points to his face and back of his head.

“What’d he use?”

“Lacrosse stick.”

“Pretentious prick.”

“Yeah pretty much.” Dirk falls silent as he lets Bro lightly poke and prod him, looking for severe injuries. He’s especially careful as he ruffles through Dirk’s hair, but deems the knot on the back of his head small enough to not be a threat. The worst that Dirk has is the cheekbone swelling, and a spot on his shoulder where the force of the blow on top of the bone had split the skin. Antibiotic gel is smeared across it and a band-aid applied. The largest bag of ice is wrapped up and applied to his cheek. Dave comes over with various bags of frozen vegetables and those are quickly strapped to Dirk’s limbs and torso.

Bro notices the state of Dave’s knuckles as he holds the peas to Dirk’s thigh when Bro wraps the long ace bandage around it to hold it in place. As soon as Dirk is drinking the water and swallowing down the painkillers, Bro grabs Dave’s hand for a closer look. The knuckles will be bruised alright, already showing signs of turning purple. No split skin and no gasps of pain as Bro moves the bones a little bit, so Dave apparently had been punching correctly. It makes Bro’s heart swell with pride which combats some of the pressing guilt at seeing his boys in such a state.

He applies the last of the makeshift ice bags to Dave as he asks, “So if you pansies look this bad, how dead is the other kid?”

“Well he was crying into the dirt like a little bitch when Dave was done with him.”

“He ran away with his tail between his legs.”

“He could still walk?” Bro growls out. Both the twins go silent as they hear the razor edge of his anger in his voice. They look at each other.

“He won’t be hurting anyone else for a fucking long time without remembering Dave’s shoe on his neck.”

“Well he’s not gonna able to take a shit for a long time with my boot up his ass.” Bro pushes up from the futon and stalks over to the nearest sword.

“Bro! No!”

“Bro! Wait! No you can’t do that. You don’t even know who it is!” Dave scrambles to his feet.

“It’s the same fucker that couldn’t take no for an answer.” The twins pale as he gets it in one.

“You still can’t!”

“Watch me.”

Dave leaps at him and catches his shirt. Dave is dragged forward a couple steps before he manages to get a better grip on Bro and gets a foot braced on the wall next to the entranceway. It takes all of his strength to keep from being pulled along easily. But Bro does eventually stop at the door.

“Bro, no. You can’t go slicing off parts of him because I have to send him a detailed diagram of the human skeleton with all the fractures I intend to make marked and described. Then I have to follow through all of that before he gets the privilege of any amputations.”

Bro frowns and sighs heavily at the front door. Dave’s threat sounded pretty good to him. Subtle yet fear wrenching enough to make the little piece of shit watch over his shoulder for the rest of his days.

“Okay. But I want all the deets on how badly you fucked this guy up.” Bro lets Dave pull him away from the door and direct him over to the couch next to Dirk. Dave runs by the kitchen to get two bottles of orange soda and a bottle of apple juice before sitting down with them.

“Well I just kinda gave him the old one two,” Dave starts to recount, frowning a bit as he doesn’t really remember too much of the first part.

“You’re leaving out the best part, Dave. Like all of this sucks, but I watched Dave flashstep like fifteen feet to land the first shot. That was pretty badass.” Dirk has to pass the orange soda back to Dave to open it for him since his hand wasn’t quite cooperating. “Though eventually we need to hold a moment of silence for my shades. A good soldier lost to the ravages of war.”

Bro feels a wave of sympathy for his brother but then glances over at the desk and feels relief that Hal’s are charging up on the shelf. He also feels a bubble of pride for Dave and his skills. He wraps a long arm around Dirk’s shoulder and pulls him close, ignoring the wince he gets. He tugs on Dave shirt to get him closer as well.

“I did give him a taste of his own medicine. I like swords better than sticks. Unwieldy as hell and terrible sense of contact. Nice sounds though,” Dave muses.

“He’s definitely going to be hurting tomorrow if how I feel is any judge.”

“You’re gonna look and feel like hell dragged through a stampede by tomorrow.”

“I don’t think I can ever watch that Lion King scene again.”

“What? Where Mufasa bites it?”

“Don’t even say his name, I’m triggered. Wildebeests with stupid accents are flashing before my eyes.” He sighs and snuggles as best he can against Bro. “Does this mean I get out of chores?”

They all perk up a bit at the sound of keys at the door. D comes in, tossing his briefcase onto the table while trying to balance the rest of the parcels in his other hand. He sees the back of his brothers’ heads over the back of the futon. “Okay, so who’s naked today?” he greets.

Dirk laughs and then groans as it hurts.

“Everything okay?” D asks cautiously. Dave simply answers by raising his hand strapped with broccoli. “I’m going to take that as a no...” He walks around the couch where he can see them all. “Oh god, what happened?” he asks automatically as he takes in Dirk’s state. He focuses in on Dirk alone after a brief glance at the other two making sure they are okay. “Oh my god, your face. Did a pony dance on your corpse?” Bro snorts at that. “Your face... the rest of you... No seriously, what the fuck? Did he fall out of the car? Dave, did you push him out? What the fuck happened?”

“Nah, Dave saved me like some badass knight in shining armor. Seems to be his thing really if you remembered that episode with Bro.”

“Some punk apparently felt he was too good for the ‘fuck off’ zone Dirk slated him for and decided to blindside our little bro with a lacrosse stick.”

“I’m going to make him eat that lacrosse stick as his last meal.” D’s voice has that same flat calculating tone that Dave’s had.

“Before you start that, D, will you get me something to eat? Then you can be part of my cuddle zone while you plot murder with these brotherfuckers, because you have some competition already.”

That seems to break D out of his fugue. He glances down at the brown paper in his hand. “Actually I brought some sushi home.”

“Mine.” Dirk lifts his good arm to make grabby hands at D. He hands it over and the Striders on the couch start to dig in as D settles on the other side of Dave. “Also, Dave, please do me a favor and never look at me with that rage mode face because it’s scary as hell. Thanks, ‘kay, bye.”

“Soooo, what’s your plan, Dave?”

 

**Author's Note:**

> For more information please check out our work at striderclan.tumblr.com; we have more stories, head canons, art/pictures.


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